|January 22, 2010.
|Greetings workers of the world! As you know, I just re-send the best joke(s) I get from the emails I gather from people all over the world. Then I add my own original drawings (which I create on the spot as I put this email together) to give it a personal touch. Most of the time I create this a few hours before Thursday midnight so if you catch a few typos, please forgive my tired mind and fingers. If this is your first time to receive this, welcome to a new and (hopefully) entertaining addiction.
I was a guest in a Toastmaster’s meeting just a few hours ago. I was supposed to stay for just an hour but they picked on me to do the impromptu speech … also known as “Table Talk” … also known as THE SPEECH FROM HELL!!! I hope I didn’t embarrass myself completely. So of course it begs the question: Will I go back and take some more beating? I had so much fun I just might.
It’s my last night with my son before he heads back to Brown for his last semester. We’re already missing him. Being a parent is always hard when the kids sprout their wings of independence.
Thanks for this week’s winners – Pete of Virginia, Dulce of Vancouver, Don of Kewlona, Judie of Simpsonville, Mike of New York and Mel of Washington, D.C.
|From Pete of Virginia
Start by doing what is necessary, then do what is possible, and suddenly you are doing the impossible.
Saint Francis of Asisi
Be sure to send me your favorite jokes. The newer the better. If it makes me laugh it could be among the TGIF Jokes of the week. Why not give your friends the gift of Funny Fridays? Subscribe them to Raoul’s TGIF Jokes.TGIF people!
sent by Dulce of Vancouver, B.C.
An old prospector shuffled into the town of El Indio, Texas leading an old tired mule.
The old man headed straight for the only saloon in town, to clear his parched throat. He walked up to the saloon and tied his old mule to the hitch rail.
As he stood there, brushing some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other.
The young gunslinger looked at the old man and laughed, saying, “Hey old man, have you ever danced?”
The old man looked up at the gunslinger and said, “No, I never did dance… Never really wanted to.”
A crowd had gathered as the gunslinger grinned and said, “Well, you old fool, you’re gonna’ dance now,” and started shooting at the old man’s feet.
The old prospector, not wanting to get a toe blown off, started hopping around like a flea on a hot skillet.
Everybody was laughing, fit to be tied.
When his last bullet had been fired, the young gunslinger, still laughing, holstered his gun and turned around to go back into the saloon.
The old man turned to his pack mule, pulled out a double-barreled shotgun, and cocked both hammers.
|The loud clicks carried clearly through the desert air.
The crowd stopped laughing immediately.
The young gunslinger heard the sounds too, and he turned around very slowly. The silence was almost deafening.
The crowd watched as the young gunman stared at the old timer and the large gaping holes of those twin barrels.
The barrels of the shotgun never wavered in the old man’s hands, as he quietly said, “Son, have you ever kissed a mule’s ass?”
The gunslinger swallowed hard and said, “No sir….. But… I’ve always wanted to.”
|Videos of the week:
sent by Don of Kewlona, BC
||Yet another one of those improv street performances. This time it’s in an Italian marketplace.
sent by Judie of Simpsonville, South Carolina
||The title intrigued me. Then I watched the video. That blew me away.
Profound is the word that comes to mind.
Medal of Honor
sent by Mike of New York
||We salute the selfless valor of Col. Robert Howard. A great man whose life impacted so many others.
Thank you for your service, sir!
Mambo Dancing Dog
sent by Mel of Washington, D.C.
||What fun! I should get me one these. My wife loves to dance and sometimes her energy is more than mine in the dance floor. If my dog could do this, she could literally dance all night.
Give us a sense of humor, Lord. Give us the grace to see a joke,
To get some humor out of life. And pass it on to other folk
submitted by Sylvia of Virginia